The Daily Life of an American Housewife & Mother
Here on Kristin & Co. I talk a lot about motherhood and minimalism. But I have yet to focus on the often marginalizing topic of what it means to be a housewife and mother in American society. Though being a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) has fallen out of fashion in other parts of the world, it’s still a popular (and often misunderstood) option for millennial women in the United States.
While the rates of SAHM’s are no where near close to those in the late 60’s - when 49% was the norm then vs. 29% now - recent studies have shown that forgoing a “career” in favor of caring for house and home has become a more desirable option for millennial women (and men too!). For women who have children, 56% say they prefer to stay home rather than working outside the home, while 39% of those who don’t have children would prefer to take on the role of homemaker.
I’ve made a few videos over the past couple of years about routines and general life as a SAHM. However, I’ve never really addressed the detailed "but why?”. It’s not about having your cake and eating it too and for many millennial women, the preference to stay home is not one that mothers are generally “happy with.”
A friend of mine once told me, “if I could stay home, find part-time work that paid well, and be able to afford childcare, that would be my ideal world.” She’s certainly not alone. With more and more women staying home to care for their child, it’s not because they wish to be the one doing all of the cooking, cleaning and child rearing, but because given wage gaps, family leave policies, lack of maternity leave, and cost of childcare, they feel this is their best option.
Because of this, I thought it worthwhile to take a deeper look into what it means to be a housewife and mother in America. Of course, there are women who choose to stay home because it is what makes them happiest in the more traditional sense. But hopefully this small glimpse into my own personal day can contribute to the conversation.
Facts about me:
Age: 32
Occupation: Housewife, works part-time from home.
Housewife Career: 4 years
My daily routine:
5:00AM - Wake up, exercise, make bed, get dressed
6:00AM - Empty dishwasher, put on a load of laundry, prepare breakfast
7:00AM - Have a cup of coffee while my 2 year old and 4 year old eat breakfast. I also use this time to plan my daily to-do list.
7:30AM - Clean up the kitchen from breakfast, take out any meat to defrost for meals, gather any materials or papers needed for my oldest son’s school.
8:00AM - Help the kids get dressed, tidy their room, and gather things for the school run.
8:30AM - Say bye to the kids (my husband usually takes them to school) and get started on housework.
9:30AM - Husband comes home with our 2 year old and then goes to work. I’ll give our son a snack, play with him, and continue cleaning the house.
11:30AM - Prepare lunch, then pick up our 4 year old from school (unless David is able to pick him up).
12:30PM - We eat lunch as a family.
1:00PM - Naps / Quiet time for the kids. I’ll clean the kitchen from lunch, then work until the children wake-up.
3:00PM - Wake up the kids (if still asleep), run errands, continue housework, prepare dinner
5:00PM - We eat dinner as a family. I’ll clean the kitchen while David plays with the kids, then join them afterwards.
6:30PM - Give the kids a bath, brush teeth, change into pj’s and read books until bedtime.
7 - 7:30PM - Kids will be in bed for the night. I’ll tidy up the house, work some more, relax with my husband reading or watching T.V.
9:30 - 10:00PM - I go to bed.
What I do for fun:
I try to enjoy some extended quiet time alone in the morning. It gives me a moment to relax while my kids are still sleeping, before the “chaos” of the day sets in.
best thing about being a housewife:
Having flexibility in my schedule. I never have to worry about whether I can be available if someone is sick or has a school function. I also enjoy being able to closely observe and watch my child grow.
Worst thing about being a housewife:
I don’t get much time to devote to myself. The weekends are easier, because David can take the kids to the park or watch them for a few hours while I take a nap or shower. Otherwise, my schedule tends to always feel like a mad dash to the next task to be done.
How many hours a week i work as a housewife:
If playing with my kids isn’t considered working, it would be 50 hours during the weekdays and maybe 5 hours on weekends.
Does my husband help me?
David helps me a lot. He takes the garbage out, helps wash dishes, cleans our shower (I’m pregnant right now), and takes care of our children.
Do I ever consider working full-time instead of being a housewife?
I have the unique position of having experience with almost every scenario of parenting. After my oldest son was born, I went back to work full-time in an office, then switched to part-time in an office, and finally decided to become a stay-at-home mom when he was almost 1 year old. Then after my second child was born, I went back to work part-time in an office when my son was about 7 months old. Then after a year we moved and I started working from home, which is what I do now. Currently, I feel this set-up is our best one. I’m expecting our third baby in July and the cost of childcare would take over any paycheck I’d have from working full-time outside the home.
What do you think about these answers? Does my situation seem different from your own? Be sure to share your thoughts in the comments below!
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